Idemromantic

Idemromantic describes a romantic orientation or an experience on the romantic spectrum. The term comes from the Latin “idem”, meaning “the same”. People may describe themselves as idemromantic if they experience romantic and platonic attraction as very similar, the same or not clearly distinguishable from each other.

For idemromantic people, relationships are often less about whether a feeling can be clearly categorized as romantic or platonic. Other criteria may be more important, such as emotional closeness, trust, commitment, shared life plans, physical intimacy or the individually negotiated meaning of a relationship. The term can be especially helpful for people whose attraction does not fit neatly into conventional categories such as “friendship” and “romantic relationship”.

Idemromantic says nothing about sexual orientation, libido, relationship style or interest in sex, dating or BDSM. An idemromantic person may have any sexual orientation and may live monogamously, polyamorously, as a relationship anarchist or in another way. It is important to discuss expectations, boundaries, terminology and forms of closeness openly, rather than automatically assigning romantic or sexual meanings to a relationship.