Mononormativity

Mononormativity refers to social norms that treat “mono” as self-evident or superior. The term is used in two different but related meanings: first, it describes the assumption that all people are monosexual, meaning exclusively attracted to one gender or one gender group. Second, it describes the assumption that all people live, or want to live, monogamously or monoamorously, meaning with only one exclusive partnership or love relationship at a time.

The first form of mononormativity devalues people whose sexual orientation is not directed toward only one gender, such as bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual or other bi+ people. It can appear as erasure, doubts about the “reality” of the orientation, assumptions of indecision or hypersexualization, and it is closely linked to anti-bi discrimination. The second form affects people who have or want consensually non-monogamous or polyamorous relationships. It can appear in prejudice, legal and social disadvantage, moral devaluation or the assumption that polyamory is inherently immature, unstable or less committed.

Both forms of mononormativity can be part of heteronormative assumptions because they restrict relationships and desire to narrow, socially expected patterns. In dating, sexuality and BDSM, it is important not to assume either sexual orientation or relationship style. Respectful encounters require clear conversations about desire, relationship expectations, exclusivity, jealousy, boundaries, safer sex and consent, rather than automatically treating monosexual or monogamous models as the norm.